He is great at communicating his feelings to me, and although we’ve never had the “relationship talk” I’ve never felt the need to have it because he shows all the signs of a great boyfriend.
However, we’re at the four month mark, and I’m starting to get a bit antsy and curious about a few things.
I have learned so much about what it means to be in a giving relationship in these four months, and he has been such a remarkable teacher of that. I think it’s always instructive for women to hear from other women that, despite all the frustrations you’ve had with dating and relationships prior to today, you don’t believe that “men” are the problem, and that, in fact, in this one instance, your boyfriend’s ex-wife was the weak link.
But, I want more at this point, and I don’t know if it’s a simple case of needing to be more patient to let things grow organically…if I just need to see things as they are and say that my needs aren’t being met and re-evaluate. This is far more common than we see here – specifically because most of the questions I post are from women complaining about men.
He has allowed me to forge an affectionate relationship with his kids but has emphasized to them that I’m a high school buddy.
We went from dating other people to monogamous pretty much from the first date; the other milestones are well behind that “natural timeline.” It occurs to me that I should have one of these talks with my SO not because I’m excited to get married again but because I know he’s open to the idea and I should probably be careful that I’m not stringing him along.
Thank you for all of your clear and concise thoughts over the last few years.
I have definitely taken things to heart: look for boyfriend behavior; there is a natural timeline where commitment should come by month three, “I love you” around 6 months, living together at 18, engaged at 2-3 years; men do what they want, and so many other pearls.
This isn’t about whether he wants to marry you; that information will take a few years to suss out.
But you should both pay attention to his profile (which plainly states his intentions) and pay attention to his words. In your particular case, while you couldn’t possibly know if you have what it takes to last 40 years as a couple, you should know if he wants more than this.2. You have two separate questions: First, “do you ever want to get married again?