It may get you a first date, but it's probably not going to get you a second date.And it certainly won't bring you lasting love and fulfillment. The writing of the books was precipitated by the endemic dating woes on the Harvard campus as I observed them as an advisor and, earlier, indulged in them as a student.
Boasting understated minimal vibes with a sleek silhouette and signature stripes, step up your style and do designer the right way.It's because they've been going at it the wrong way. For most of their lives, smart people inhabit a seemingly-meritocratic universe: If they work hard, they get good results (or, in the case of really smart folks, even if they don't work hard, they still get good results).Good results mean kudos, strokes, positive reinforcement, respect from peers, love from parents.In other words, you need to earn love (or at least lust).Sadly, no mom, dad or professor teaches us about the power of the well-placed compliment (or put-down), giving attention but not too much attention, being caring without being needy.I wrote a whole 280-page book about that, so that's a story for a different day. You don't feel like a fully-realized sexual being and therefore don't act like one.At some point in your life, you got pegged as a smart person.Dating is at best another extracurricular, number six or number seven down the list, somewhere between Model UN and intramural badminton.I've been co-hosting young alumni events for name-brand schools for long enough to know that these kids come out a little lopsided (which sounds so much better than "socially awkward," don't you think? All they need is a little tune up, or a little dating textbook like The Tao of Dating for Women or The Tao of Dating for Men, to get them going -- plus a little practice.By virtue of being born of the union of male and female, yang and yin, you are a sexual being. Now do what you need to do to perpetuate the race already. Perhaps you should consider thinking a little less then.Because heaven knows that the amoeba, worm, fish, amphibian, monkey and primitive hominids didn't do a whole lot of thinking.