Aliayah: She could just as easily convert to mine could she not? A face saving exercise for the sake of the father of the girlfriend?
As I've been told "love someone for the sake of God".
almost everything you are doing is going against that. and it requires the utmost of politeness and respect in every way. so it's sacred not only because of what is between the heart of the man and the woman and the need to protect the holiness of that, but because it forms the very nucleus of civilized society. it can't begin in a lie, or in avoidance, or in pretense.
so you can't afford to underestimate her concerns about her family, not with any justice. to be strong, it has to have a solid foundation, no cracks, and no rotting timbers.
really, it's right up there with "there is no god except God".
he gave us a serious harangue on that point a couple summers ago. a large part of the function of religion on the human plane is to strengthen and safeguard family relations, because they are the taproot of healthy culture. in a way, you could say it's a marriage of two families.