Plus, not having adequately prepared for these practical aspects of sex may signal an overall non-readiness to engage in it.
At some point during their courtship, many dating couples decide its time to break down initial boundaries -- be they emotional, physical, or both -- and engage in a sexual relationship.
"It becomes much more difficult to objectively see each other's character traits" says Susanne Alexander, a relationship coach and author of Can We Dance? "Some couples then slide into engagement and marriage only to discover they have missed seeing major aspects of each other." While not every dating scenario that involves sex leads to marriage or even a serious relationship, couples do owe it to themselves to talk about where they see their relationship going and how sex might change the relationship -- before they get in bed together. The woman may assume sex implies a commitment; the man may not see it that way," Allen tells Web MD.
Having an honest conversation with yourself about sex is just as important as discussing it with your partner, experts say.
"The risks of STDS have got to be discussed and prevented from spreading," Allen tells Web MD.
"I say definitely use condoms, even if you're in a committed relationship," she adds.
She also says the conversation, like the primping, should happen at the same time -- before that big date.
"Think about your sexual boundaries before you've had that first drink," Mc Clary advises.
If you can’t stand the person but have a great physical relationship, rethink the relationship. If one person is uncomfortable with any type of physical expression, don’t do it. Don’t push a date to do anything that makes him/her feel uncomfortable. Once you've decided what you want out of a date, say experts, you should make it part of your regular dating rules to tell your partner."If you just want a one-night stand, you owe it to your partner to tell them 'it's just sex I'm after,'" Mc Clary tells Web MD.According to the singles whom Allen has encountered, boomers generally play by far different dating rules than young, 20-something daters."I spoke with a young man in his early to mid-20s who told me that if he didn't have sex on the first or second night, he'd move on to the next person," she recalls."My advice is this: wait as long as you can," Allen says.Her rationale for these dating rules may seem obvious, but many people tend to forget in the heat of the moment.While you can't apply a one-size-fits-all response to sexual dating rules regardless of age or experience, professionals who have studied the topic say it is a good idea to develop a set of prudent dating rules - before the big date.By and large, Allen and other relationship experts endorse a cautious approach to the dating rules of sex."It depends on how rapidly or slowly things progress." Joan Allen, a relationship expert, finds that baby boomers are far more likely to wait to have sex than younger daters."Especially among older people who went through the sexual revolution, with maturity they realize there are emotional consequences for getting involved in a sexual relationship," says Allen, author of Celebrating Single and Getting Love Right: From Stalemate to Soulmate.